My blouse strained across my breasts and I was afraid the buttons might give and my bottom seemed to swell against the material of my suit pants tightening across it to bursting point. One hand circled my waist, gripping me not tightly but securely, the other arrived on my bottom smoothing over each side in turn before patting me lightly, my stomach churned and oddly, my pussy began to tingle from clit to just inside me. I hadn’t expected that and wasn’t sure what I was feeling, his knee beneath me seemed made of rock, then he hitched me over a little more and my hair slid from my back over the top of my head onto the carpet in front of me. I could feel my tights and pants surging up the cleft of my bottom and between my legs, I wished I had worn knickers! ‘Oooooow!’ I squealed, his hand clapped against my pants bringing a real sting with it, then he did it again and I yelped along with it, bucking on his knee but restrained by his arm around me. ‘Oooooow! … Oouuuch!’ I shouted in. But you never made a move because you knew too that I couldn’t and that it would have hurt us both too much.’ She was right. ‘I knew you’d always be my closest friend because you love me and I love you. But we both knew it could never be physical. We never needed to say it, we knew.’ I nodded slowly. ‘I’m so sorry.’ ‘You don’t need to be.’ She stood up. ‘Have another cigarette and come back when you’re ready, OK?’ She leaned down to look closely into my eyes and I nodded again. ‘Silly cow.’ I smiled a wan smile to myself as she walked away. I had never had a lover since University. I had always hoped, always half expected that Jess would claim me. I knew at the same time that she never would but nobody came close, nobody else mattered in that way. Oh, of course I had had people to share my bed, to fuck, but that’s all it was. They always disappointed, always fell short. Only Jess would do. I smoked another cigarette then, feeling extremely silly and embarrassed walked slowly back.
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